Musings of a Mommy

This is another picture I meant to post yesterday. Lexie thinks my belly is hilarious and even told me one day, “Mommy, your belly is big!” Thanks hon.

Tomorrow is the 4th of July and we’re going to take Lexie downtown to enjoy some of the festivities. Her preschool is going to have a booth full of kids’ activities so we’ll head down there and then the parade is at 2. Hopefully she’ll take a late nap and then we’ll go to fireworks tomorrow evening. We’ve never taken her to fireworks so this should be an experience.

Lately, to combat the heat (this week has been an anomaly and in the 70’s. Last week it was in the high 80’s/low 90’s and I was dying….), Lexie and I have been inside as much as possible. We usually go somewhere in the mornings and then swim in the afternoons in our pool. This year Lexie has a life jacket that she wears and she can swim all over the pool by herself. It’s fantastic!! We totally have a water baby!

I read a lot of “mommy blogs.” I love to hear how other mommies deal with being a parent and everything that goes along with it. One blog I read, Suburban Turmoil: Wiping Ass and Taking Names is hilarious, as you can gather from her blog title. She has written a series of posts about parenting and how people (especially other mommies) are so judgmental to her style of parenting. In one of her latest post she talks about how she doesn’t apologize for the amount of television her children watch, not bathing her kids everyday, or letting her son have a bottle of warm milk occasionally. As I read that, I thought about freeing it would be to let go of apologizing or feeling the need to explain to others about your parenting habits. To be able to say “Yeah, she watches a lot of TV but that’s okay. She still plays outside, socializes and is a normal kid.”  Or to say, “Yeah, she’s almost 3 and not potty trained. So what?” Or, “Her diet isn’t varied but she’s healthy and happy.”  Wow. I mean, it would reduce the amount of stress I put on myself so much. The author of the blog goes on to say that she doesn’t’ feel the need to worry about those things because she knows she’s a good mom. At the end of the day, she loves her children fiercely and always will.

Now I’m not saying that no boundaries or discipline is the way I want to go but sometimes I just think that if I had the attitude of my child is happy, healthy and loved and how we keep her that way is our business and no concern of yours, my life would be much happier and less stressful.

Anyway, that’s something that’s been on my mind lately.

I’ll leave you with a favorite picture of mine:

A very pitiful pouty face.

So I am almost 39 weeks pregnant (I will be on Sunday).  And, I am 1 cm dilated and 80% effaced. This baby isn’t coming soon.  My doctor was willing to schedule an induction for Sunday night but I said no. I do think that I will be willing to induce at 40 weeks, if I’m still not progressing at all.

This is me a couple of weeks ago:

I believe I’m bigger now. My belly truly enters the room before I do.  I’m feeling okay - kind of uncomfortable but not horribly so.  Grrr….I shall be pregnant forever.
Well, I’m craving Mexican food and since Mimi was kind enough to take Lexie for the evening, we’re going out to eat. Isn’t spicy Mexican food supposed to induce labor?

I’ve decided I don’t like the theme that’s up right now. As soon as Matt gets a chance, I’m going to have him change it to something else…

We’ve been really busy lately around here. I’ve hit the point in my pregnancy where I have lots of energy (until late evening, then I crash) so Lexie and I are out and about most days. One day we went to the Newport Aquarium with Mimi and Papaw. Lexie loved it. Did she understand exactly what she was looking at? No. But, she thought the tunnels were the coolest things ever.

And, of course we saw Mumble, which Lexie always enjoys. 

Another day Mimi and I took Lexie to the Lexington Cemetery to take some pictures of Lexie “tiptoeing through the tulips.”  Some of my favorite pictures I’ve taken in a long time. My personal favorite is this one:

Or these:

I loved a lot of pictures from the batch. Of course, it always helps when you have such an adorable subject.

Matt has been out of town this past weekend. He went to NYC to see The Grateful Dead in Madison Square Garden. From what he’s been texting and Twittering me, he’s having a blast. Lexie and I have been having a girls weekend. Yesterday we ran some errands in Hamburg, played outside, went to dinner with Mimi and Papaw, played on a playground and Lexie got to sleep with Mommy last night. Sadly enough, it’s Mommy that likes the reassurance of her little body next to mine. I hate to stay by myself. I have a vivid imagination and get freaked out really easily…Anyway, today Lexie spent some time with Mimi at her house so I could have a few hours to myself. Then, (after skipping her nap) Lexie played outside all afternoon. We grilled out with Mimi and Papaw. Lexie was asleep by 8, which NEVER happens. Poor thing was just exhausted. Tomorrow I’m volunteering at her school so we both have a big day. Plus, we have to pick Matt up from the airport tomorrow afternoon.

Our kitchen renovation begins on the 4th of May and I’m rapidly getting rid of stuff. So, watch out, if you stop by my house, you’ll likely be leaving with something in your arms!

Oh, and I forgot to show Lexie’s favorite part of the aquarium….

The gift shop.

Matt and I are trying to work on/update my blog. Sorry for all the theme changes and construction…..I’m not quite sure what the final product will be.

It really is 5:40 and I’m blogging. I’ve been awake since 4:30. No one else is the house is awake and I can’t sleep. This is not going to be a good day. 

One of the cats woke me up at 4:30 (I hate our cats.) and I couldn’t get back to sleep. I was so hungry that I couldn’t sleep. Plus, I started thinking about Lexie’s (lack of) potty training and that didn’t help me relax enough to go back to sleep. 

So I’m sitting on the couch, watching Roseanne (there’s really nothing on TV at this time), eating Captain Crunch (healthy healthy!) and drinking orange juice straight from the carton. Classy, huh? I’m dreading when Lexie gets up because my day will then start and it’s going to be a rough one, with getting up in the middle of the night.

Matt’s okay. The incision in his belly button (where they repaired his umbilical hernia) is giving him a lot of pain. He’s been unable to do much around the house - he can’t bend over, pick anything heavy up, hold Lexie…Did I mention I’m exhausted?  And it’s only been 5 days? I’m getting up with her in the mornings, watching her all day, putting her down for her naps, doing bathtimes, and putting her down at night. If she wakes up in the middle of the night, I’m there. If one of the cats feels the need to go outside in the middle of the night (hate hate hate them), I’m the one up. I’m the one lifting everything, doing all the housework, cooking…I’m really tired. Okay, my pity party is over. 

So the other reason I couldn’t sleep tonight is because I started thinking of the lack of potty training going on at our house. When we registered Lexie for preschool, I wasn’t concerned. There was 7 months until she started. Plenty of time to potty train. Fast forward 3 months and there is no progress. None. She still will not, under any circumstances, use the potty. If she would just go occasionally in the potty, I think I would have more hope but she won’t. We’ve done a couple of “naked afternoons” where I let her run around without a diaper or underwear on and encourage her to potty. She will go without using the bathroom for 3 hours or so. She just holds it. She’ll sit on the potty, run around, play, sit some more but nothing in the potty. I’m so frustrated. And, I’m starting to panic. 

I see our registration fee floating out the window every day that passes by without any progress. I foresee my mad scramble trying to find another preschool (with another registration fee) that she can go to in diapers. Or, I see Lexie not going to preschool at all in the fall because she’s not potty trained. It is explicitly written out in the contract with Good Shepherd that the child has to be potty trained, and potty trained well,  to attend preschool. They’re not going to make allowances for me. 

I am so frustrated I want to scream. Lexie shows every readiness sign to start training. She understands the concept of a reward. She just won’t go in the potty. She’s not scared. She’ll sit on the big potty and little potty without incident. She is fascinated when I go to the bathroom (when do I get my privacy back?) and can give a play by play of what happens. She role plays with her dolls and stuffed animals with potty training them. I just don’t understand why she won’t go in the potty. 

I see no improvements with potty training and now we’re down to 4 months. 4 months for her to be completely potty trained with little to no accidents. I just don’t know if it’s going to happen. And, I know, I know…it will happen when “she’s ready” and “don’t push it” but that’s easy for other people to say. They’re not on our time table. We have a baby entering this house 6 weeks before Lexie starts preschool. That’s going to be enough upheaval for her. 

I’m just at a loss of what to do. And I’m so frustrated.

And now, of course, I’m getting tired, just in time for Lexie to be awake in an hour or less. 

I hope the day improves.

There is a blog I have been reading for about a year. The mom, Heather, is hilarious. Seriously, I have a bunch of blogs I skim through (mostly ones written by multiple people) but I always enjoy reading Heather’s blog.  She lives in LA. She recently lost her job working for the Dodgers. She has a dog named Rigby. And, her 17-month-old, Maddie, unexpectedly passed away last week.

When I read the blog post, I cried. Now, I have never met these people but through pictures and posts, I feel like I knew Maddie. She was a preemie. Heather and her husband, Mike, went through ups and downs with therapists, doctors, nutritionists, ER visits, oxygen tubes, etc. But through it all, Heather kept her sense of humor and Maddie smiled her bright smile.

I felt like an idiot crying over a child I never met but still, I did. It was so unexpected. Heather’s last post was about ice cream. Then, there was a post from a friend that Maddie was in the hospital with an accelerated pulse and having trouble breathing. Heather’s Twitter account said they were intubating her. The next post was that she died.

I felt so grateful for what I have. I have a healthy, beautiful child that is, at this moment, sleeping peacefully in her bed. I can go hug her, love her, touch her. Yes, I worry about her. I worry about potty training but thank goodness she’s here to try. I worry about her speech development but thank goodness she’s here to say anything at all. Yes, she drives me crazy some days but thank goodness she’s here. I am so lucky.

My thoughts and prayers are with the Sporhs right now. Tomorrow Heather and Mike’s baby girl will be laid to rest in LA. I can’t even imagine how, as a parent, you manage to live through that.

If anyone would like to read about this family, the website is http://remembermaddie.com/.

We had the best weekend!  Saturday morning we went to Keeneland. We were trying to get there for Breakfast with the Works but we can’t seem to make it in time. Lexie got up about 7:15 and making it to Keeneland by 8 was impossible. Plus setting an alarm to get up at 6ish on a Saturday just seems wrong. So we went and just walked around, saw the horses and saw the workouts on the track. Lexie was in heaven.  She even managed to make it home with a stuffed Secretariat horse. Apparently he gets in trouble a lot because I constantly hear, “No, no! Sit down! Stay there. You’re in time out!” from the backseat. (Is that how I sound?!?!)

Some shots from Keeneland. It was a blustery spring day!

After Keeneland, we took Lexie for a haircut and a cookie from Panera. After a quick lunch at home, we headed to Jacobson Park for Kite Fest. We had never been to Kite Fest before and I wasn’t quite sure what to expect but it was so much fun! Mimi hooked Lexie up with an Oreo kite (it was love at first sight) and we managed to get the kite up a couple of times. But, they had a bounce house, food, and of course, the playground. For the third time ever, Lexie skipped her nap (this was the first time we intentionally did it) and she did great. It resulted in an earlier bedtime (which Mommy and Daddy loved!) but she was in a great mood all day.

Some pics from Kite Fest:

And, of course, Sunday was Easter. Lexie woke up and the first thing she said was, “Easter bunny present?”  Lovely. We went to church in the morning, and Lexie cracked us up multiple times. We got her out of the nursery a little bit earlier than usual (we usually get her for Eucharist/communion). She ran into the church (which was PACKED, of course) and said, “HI APRIL!” Then, as she squirmed and wiggled around in the pew, she said, “Look! BABY JESUS! LOOK! CANDLES! LOOK! AUNT BON BON AND DANA!” It was sooo loud. Then, at one point of the service, everyone (very loudly) said, “AMEN” and Lexie jumped, turned around and said, “I’m scared!” Too funny.

After the service, there was a small reception for the kids on the playgroup. Lexie and I had made chocolate chip cookies to take and share and she really enjoyed running around, swinging, jumping, etc. It was soo cold and I was freezing but she didn’t even seem to mind.

After church we came home for lunch and her nap and then headed to Mimi and Papaw’s house for some family time and dinner. She got another Easter basket and played with her cousin, Cameron, and Papaw. Cameron hid some eggs for Lexie and Papaw and Lexie looked for them. Mimi had put coins in all the eggs, which thrilled Lexie to no end.

Some pictures from Easter:

 Today is a “school day” and the first thing Lexie said this morning was, “It’s a school day! Go see Ms. Hamilton!!” She loves her school and Mommy especially loves the few free hours to go grocery shopping without Lexie’s “help.” 

We made a deal today that if she went pee pee on the potty at school, I would take her to Gattitown for lunch (or as she called  it today, Pottytown).  I’m not holding my breath but we’ll see….

So I took some time (about 2 1/2 hours) last night and today to download the pictures, upload them to Flickr, and title them. So I’m ready to showcase our life in pictures since January…

Ice Storm

My favorite picture from playing in the snow.

Our Activities During The Ice Storm:

Playing with every toy in the house.

Baking Cookies (and eating Oreos)

Taking Hour Long Baths With Tons Of Toys

And Attempting French Braids and Giving Up A Third Of The Way Down

 In February, Lexie took it upon herself to fix another bowl of cereal. (And yes, she still insists on eating that nasty infant cereal in the mornings, much to our dismay. Oh well, at least it’s nutritious…)

And in March, we enjoyed the few warm days with playground and outside time.

And, so far in April, we’ve been celebrating Easter with dyeing Easter eggs and visiting the Easter Bunny. I don’t have any pics of Lexie dyeing Easter eggs since I was too busy enjoying the activity myself….However, Lexie did enjoy spending soem time with her friend, Leslie’s, little sister Lucy. I’m hoping it’s good practice for when her little sister arrives!

We’ve all been busy, of course. We’ve taken Lexie to Keeneland once this meet (she loves it!) and we’re going tomorrow morning for some kid activities and to see the horses! Easter will bring a cute dress and some family time at Mimi and Papaw’s house.

Matt, unfortunately, has to have his gall bladder removed next Tuesday. The surgery is at 6 am (ouch) so we’ll be up bright and early for that. Thankfully Mimi is keeping Lexie so that’s one less worry.

I have my glucose test next week - yuck. I’m not a big fan of the sugary drink I’ll get to drink. However, it’s another opportunity to hear the baby’s heartbeat. She’s a big kicker and has remarkable aim - she hits my bladder often. She’s really active, which is always kind of nice to get a hello kick from her, especially when she doesn’t like the way I’m sitting or laying. I’m 27 weeks on Sunday, so almost in the final stretch. Once Matt and I get on the ball and take a (cute) picture of me, all pregnant, I’ll post that.

We’re still undecided about names. We need help! We’re down to Leah Elizabeth, Elise Anne, or Taylor Anne. Anyone have a preference??

And…a picture from the last ultrasound:

Welcome Coach Cal to the Bluegrass State! I hope this relationship works out well.

The last 4 days have been a whirlwind for the Elliott household with the firing of Billy G. and then the subsequent coach search. All of a sudden, our iPhones became attached appendages, the laptop was constantly on and we were receiving constant text messages and updates on what was going on. Facebook became more than a social networking site - it was a news sharing site. It was craziness.

There is nothing like UK basketball to me. It is such an ingrained part of my life. There are rarely seasons that I can’t rattle off the roster and have an opinion on most of the players. My husband, however, puts me to shame. He seems to know everything there is to know about UK basketball and does the one thing I can’t do - retain that info. He can rattle off the rosters and stats from seasons ‘91 and on. Maybe even before that. I’m not sure.

So it’s been an exciting weekend in basketball country. I’m sure campus is rockin tonight and tomorrow the official press conference should be awesome…too bad I’ll be at Gymboree with Lexie and will have to tape it.

In other, unrelated news…I have felt crappy all day long. No idea why. I woke up nauseous and lightheaded. I canceled my appointments for the day and have left the couch maybe 4 or 5 times. I have just felt bad. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll feel better.

When I found out that I was pregnant with a girl (the first go around), I started having hopes and images of what my future would have. I pictured the moments, kind of frozen in time, of memories I would make with my daughter. Of course, there are the typical ones - prom dress shopping, shopping for the first bra, seeing the flush on her face from the first kiss, moving out, buying a wedding dress…those are the big ones. There were countless little ones that I thought of, too. When I would go to get a pedicure, I would think, “Some day I may be joined in these excursions with my little girl.”  It’s always something I wanted - to make these memories.

Today Lexie and I ran an errand to the grocery. She was a gem the entire time. Of course I had to use one of those ridiculous car carts that is almost like driving a semi through the grocery store aisles. But, I digress.

On the way home, Lexie began singing “Mamma Mia.” For some reason, she loves that song (much to Matt’s dismay). So I took out my iphone, put the song on and we sang the whole way home. I blasted it, on a sunny day, and we sang. Lexie mostly sings, “MAMMA MIA! MAMMA MIA!” over and over and over but regardless, it’s adorable.

It was totally one of those moments. I couldn’t wait until my daughter and I would sing loudly, at the top of our lungs, on a sunny day and today we made the first, of hopefully, many many many of those memories.

It made my day.